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Archive-name: First/firsts.txt
Archive-author: Jon Van
Archive-title: My Sexual Biography - A Story of Firsts



   Everything depicted below, be it places, names, characters,
   expressions or opinions, are fictional and is to be regarded as
   fiction. Similarity between aforementioned places, names, characters,
   expressions or opinions and real events is purely coincidental
   and unintentional.

   The contents of this material is in no way intended to be
   derogatory, demeaning or humiliating towards any of the sexes or
   any kind of sexual behaviour. Neither are the use of specific words
   meant to be derogatory.

   Criticism, encouragement, suggestions, ideas, requests and in fact,
   ALL kinds of feedback, are greatly appreciated.
..........................................................................


     My name is Jon Van.  I am a 47 year old bisexual male.  The following
stories are the highlights of my sexual self-discovery.  I hope that you
enjoy reading about my sexual self-exploration as much as I did living and
writing about it.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

     My first sexual experience was with George when I was 16 years old.
George and I had been best buddies since 1st grade.  A couple of years
before this experience, we had started to get what we called "skin mags and
screw books" at a cigar store/newsstand in a city close by.  Our practice
was to "sleep out" and read the magazines and books.  For a long time after
starting to read the porno nothing happened.

     It was during our summer vacation and after spending the day at the
beach (George was a life guard), we decided to come back to the park to
sleep out.  We went home to assemble our camping gear and told our parents
that we were going to spend the night at the state park.  We loaded up our
motor bikes and returned to the park.  We picked a primitive camp site well
away from other campers and set up camp.  After we had dinner, we lit the
gas lantern and pulled out the "skin books".

     After reading explicit stories and gazing at the pictures of bare
breasts and pussies, we started talking about how horny we were.  As
teenagers will, we started talking about "I'm so horny I'd screw .... (fill
in the name of an unattractive girl we both knew)."  What was different
that night was that my friend said he was so horny he could "beat his meat
in public".  I said, "Aw, get outta here, you wouldn't."  He replied,
"Wanna bet?"  He then proceeded to bring his cock out of his shorts.  His
cock was as hard as a rock.  He started moving his hand slowly up and down
his cock.  He was staring at me as if to say "you're chicken".

     I was mesmerized by the slow motion of his hand and the obvious
pleasure that he was getting.  Feeling my face burning red and very
confused, I slowly unzipped my shorts and pulled out my cock.  It, too, was
hard and was wet on the end.  I started to pull and massage my cock.  I
looked up and saw my friend staring at my cock, so I returned my eyes to
his cock.  I began to feel an urge to touch his cock.  I wanted to put my
arms around him and feel his body against mine.

     Whether George was reading my mind or was just feeling similar things,
he moved first.  With his free hand, he reached over and put his hand over
my hand and started pumping along with my hand.  I let go of my cock and
reached over to grip his cock.  He let go of his cock and let me stroke it.
I was almost gasping for breath with tension and arousal.  His hand felt so
good.  George picked up the pace and closed his eyes, a look of pure bliss
on his face.  It wasn't very long until I could feel the pressure building
in my balls, I   looked into my friend's eyes.  The tingling sensation in
my balls suddenly traveled all the way up my back.  I felt hot and cold all
over.  I felt the cum spurting out of my cock.  Then, I felt George's cock
start to pulse and I felt his hot cum flowing down over my hand.

     I slowly withdrew my hand as George did the same.  We quickly wiped
ourselves off and stuffed our cocks back into our shorts, avoiding each
others eyes.  We quickly got ready for bed and turned off the gas lantern.

     I laid awake for a long time that night, and I think George did too.
The sensations and the feelings that this evening aroused in me, kept me
wake for hours.  The next morning, we packed up and headed home.  Neither
of us ever mentioned the incident again.  After college, we sort of drifted
apart, but I've always wondered about George.  I understand he never
married, and never really had a steady girl.  I will, however, always
treasure the memory of our sexual adventure and I hope George does too.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

     My second sexual experience was much more conventional.  I had met a
girl by the name of Carol in high school chorus.  We started out joking
around a lot and moved to flirting.  I finally worked up the nerve and
asked her to the Homecoming Dance.  She accepted.  We got along great.  We
continued to go out together so it wasn't long before we were a "couple".

     I was still fairly naive about girls, despite the porno books and
magazines that I had read.  We had had several dates before I worked up the
courage to kiss her.  Carol was a "good" girl, so it was a long time before
we started seriously petting and necking.  Eventually, she allowed me to
unhook her bra and to pet her bare breasts.  Carol was not a large busted
girl but she was well proportioned.  I especially liked the way her nipples
hardened and extended when she was hot.

     It was the summer of my 18th year that Carol (who was 17) and I
finally went all the way.  We had been going together for about a year and
a half.  The previous winter I had persuaded Carol into letting me to not
only kiss and suck on her breasts but to finger-fuck her as well.
Recently, she had even consented to giving me a hand job when I complained
about getting "blue balls".

     We had gone to a romantic movie at the drive-in and were driving home.
We had petted and necked a lot during the movie, so when I suggested that
we stop at a deserted farm, she readily agreed.  After we had parked the
car, I got a blanket out of the back seat and spread it out on the ground.
At first, we just lay on the blanket, cuddling close and talking about "our
future".

     We started kissing very passionately and I put my arms around her.
She responded by opening her mouth and dueling her tongue with mine.  My
cock by now had gotten hard and we started to grind our hips together.
After a few moments of this, I started fumbling with her bra.  She let me
unhook it.  I broke the kiss and lifted her shirt and bra.  Her pert
breasts were very beautiful in the moonlight.  I lowered my mouth to her
left nipple and began to lick and suck on it.  The nipple slowly came erect
and Carol started to breath heavily.  I loved the soft but firm texture of
her breasts and nipples.  As I switched to the other breast, I rolled Carol
over on her back.  With both her arms now free, she threw her arms around
my head pulled my face tightly against her breasts.  I was in heaven.

     I slowly worked my hand across her stomach to her jeans and started to
unbutton the fly.  Carol either didn't notice or didn't care because I got
the fly all the way open and worked my hands down inside the panties.  I
could feel the pubic hair and the beginning of her pussy lips but I
couldn't go any further because her pants were so tight.  I lifted my head
from her breasts and said, "Honey, let me get your pants off....".  She
looked at me blankly for a moment and then lifted her hips off the blanket.
I quickly pulled her pants and panties off and returned to her breasts with
my mouth.  I moved my hand down to her pussy without any restriction.  I
slowly began to feel my way around.  I put my finger between her pussy lips
and found that she was very wet.  I started to explore for her clit.  All
the time I was also licking and sucking on her breasts.  Carol started
moaning and whispering, "Oh, Jon that feels good, don't stop".

     My cock was so hard and big I thought it would burst out of my pants,
but I didn't want to break the spell, so I continued to nurse her breast
and feel for her clit.  At last when I found it, Carol jumped and let out a
louder moan.  I started to massage it with my thumb and found her hole with
one of my other fingers and slowly inserted it.  Carol was panting and
moaning so loudly now that I thought the whole world would hear.  As I
finger-fucked her, I whispered in her ear to undo my fly and take my cock
out.  At first I don't think she understood, but then she started fumbling
with my fly.  I moved my hand from her pussy only long enough to unzip my
fly and pull out my cock.  She grabbed it and began to squeeze and massage
it.  "Gently, gently", I whispered.  After I resumed finger-fucking her, I
put my lips close to her ear and said, "Let's go all the way."

     At first she didn't respond but after I asked again, she nodded her
head.  I put my mouth on hers and kissed her deeply.  I jumped up and
quickly peeled off my pants and lay down between her legs.  I was just to
the point of entering her when I remembered I had no rubber on.  I reached
over to my pants and pulled the rubber out of the pocket where I always
kept it.  I quickly put it on and again laid down between her legs.  I
began kissing her breasts again as I took my cock in hand and found her
pussy hole.  I slowly pushed my cock in.  She was very wet, so my cock
slipped in without too much resistance.  I transferred my mouth to hers and
began to kiss her.  Carol seemed to be enjoying it without any pain, so I
pushed all the way in.  Carol grunted and again threw her arms around my
neck.  I started to slowly work my cock in and out.  It felt great, warm
and soft, yet tight and exciting.  I tried to go slowly, to hold back so
Carol would be able to cum too.  Soon Carol started to move with me.  Her
hips began to get into the rhythm and her breathing came quicker as her
arms tightened around me.  Rubber or no, I knew I couldn't last very long,
I could feel the gathering tightness in my balls.  Carol started to moan
again and whisper, "Harder, go in all the way, do it faster!"  So I let
myself go and started to piston my hips.

     Carol resumed kissing me and started to buck her hips harder.  I knew
she was close but when she lifted her hips and back off the blanket and
ground her pussy on my cock, I knew she was cumming.  This set me off and I
could feel the tingling, hot and cold sensation build from my balls up my
back.  I could feel the cum traveling down my cock and spurting out.

     We lay there on the blanket, hot and sweaty, for several minutes.
Finally, when our breathing had returned to normal, she kissed me and
whispered that she loved me.  With my cock still inside her and
experiencing a wonderful afterglow, I whispered back that I loved her too.

     Many other sessions followed that summer.  That fall we became
engaged.


----------------------------------------------------------------------


     Carol and I got married after I had graduated from college.  I had
recently gotten a job at a local company and finally we could afford to get
married.  It was on our honeymoon that I first became addicted to oral sex.

     Our wedding was very traditional, so that it had been a long day by
the time we could get away.  We were both very tired.  Our wedding night
was spent in a motel about fifty miles from home.  We were both so
exhausted by then that we made love in a very mechanical way, more because
we were supposed to that because we wanted to.

     The next day we got on the road early and made it to our destination
just after noon.  We had reserved a cabin at a honeymoon resort.  Our
rustic cabin was very romantic, with a great view.  After unpacking, I took
her in my arms and kissed her deeply.  When we came up for air, Carol
giggled and said, "Now, lets make up for lost time".  Carol and I had
agreed to remain celibate for a month before our wedding to make the
honeymoon more special.

     Grinning, I responded, "And do we have a lot of making up to do".  I
had something special to try.  I wanted to go down on her but I wasn't sure
how she would react.

     I gathered her into my arms and resumed kissing her.  I started to
slowly unbutton her shirt while I continued the kiss.  I broke the kiss and
started trailing kisses across her cheek and over to her ear.  As I kissed
and blew in her ear, my hands remained busy removing her shirt and undoing
her bra.  I kissed and licked my way down her neck to her breasts.  By now
Carol, abandoning herself to my seduction whispered, "I love you."  As I
kissed and licked her breasts I undid her skirt and let it fall to the
floor.  I worked my way back up to her mouth and kissed her passionately.
We were holding each other tightly when I broke the kiss and looked into
her eyes.  "Let's take a shower together."  Grinning, she agreed.

     We raced into the bathroom and she started the shower going while I
got undressed.  She had her back to me adjusting the water, when, naked, I
grabbed her from behind.  I pressed my erection against her butt and
reached around to grab her breasts.  She laughed and pressed back against
me.  Backing away, I grabbed her panties and pulled them down to her
ankles.  Turning around, she took my hand and led me into the shower.

     We embraced under the cascading water.  She started grinding her hips
and stomach against my cock.  I kissed her and ran my hands slowly down
from her back to her butt.  Carol started to rub her entire body against
mine.

     After a few moments of the slipping and sliding embrace, I backed away
and grabbed the soap.  I quickly unwrapped it and started to wash her.  I
started with her neck and shoulders, massaging as much as washing, and
progressed to her breasts.  There I took my time, loving the slippery
feeling of her breasts and hard nipples as my hands slipped over them
repeatedly.  Reluctantly, I left her breasts and continued down to her
stomach and stopped just short of her pubic hair.  I turned her around and
washed her back.

     Carol said, "Now I know why lovers like to shower together."

     I expanded from her back to her butt and ran my soapy hands into her
crack and I gently massaged her anus and moved further to her pussy.  Carol
spread her legs and moaned a little.  Intent on teasing her more I stopped
and continued washing down her legs.  I moved around to the front of her
again and washed my way back up to her pubic area.  There I slowed down and
thoroughly washed the insides of her thighs and finally moved to wash her
pussy.

     In all our love-making in the past, it had been in the dark, so this
was my first opportunity to look closely at her pussy.  I liked what I saw.
Her lips were swollen and the inner lips where just peeking out.  I spread
her outer lips and slowing and gently washed her.  I spent plenty of time
washing her clitoris and then moved to her lovely vagina.  By this time,
Carol was panting and gasping with passion.

     I stood up and pulled her into my arms.  She was still covered with
soap so I started rubbing my body against hers, like she had done to me
earlier.  We kissed and our tongues were intertwined as our bodies were.

     Reluctantly, I separated from her and started rinsing her off.  I
said, "Let's finish this in bed".  She nodded.  I quickly washed as Carol
got out of the shower and dried herself off.  I followed just a moments
later.

     Back in the bedroom, I guided Carol to the edge of the bed and sat her
down.  Then kneeling in front of her I resumed kissing her mouth.  Again, I
kissed and licked my way down her front, paying special attention to her
breasts.  However, I didn't just stop there.  Carol was moaning softly and
panting in her arousal.  I gently laid her back on the bed with her legs
still over the edge.

     There before me was her pussy.  I looked closely at her "V" shaped
lips.  The outer lips were swollen with arousal, the inner lips glistening
with moisture.  I started by kissing her inner thighs and working my way
back to her pussy.  I thought that Carol was too far gone in her passion to
notice where I was heading.  Finally, I reached her pussy and inserted my
tongue between her lips and started to lick my way to her clitoris.  The
taste and smell were strange, very musky but very, very arousing.  Carol
pressed herself to my face.  As I found her clitoris, she jumped and let
out a loud moan.  "What are you doing, it feels so great", she gasped.
Having my mouth full, I just concentrated on what I was doing.

     I slid my tongue over her clit and forced the tip under the skin
covering her little erection.  As I savored the taste and feel, I continued
to massage her clit faster with the tip of my tongue.  I moved down to her
vagina and pushed my tongue inside.  Carol's hips were starting to buck and
push at my face.  I moved back up to her center of attraction and began to
rapidly lick and suck.  It took only a few moments of this before I could
feel Carol's lower stomach muscles begin to twitch and I could feel her
hole begin to contract spasmodically.  Carol yelled and started quivering
all over as she experienced her orgasm.  I continued to lick and suck, but
she pushed me away, saying "No, it's too much, stop!".

     I got into bed beside her and held her until she had recovered.  She
said, "That was wonderful, I've never felt anything so good in my life."
She reached over and put her hand on my cock.  "I want to make you feel as
good as you made me feel", she whispered.

     She moved over in the bed and motioned for me to get all the way on
the bed.  As I lay on my back, she got on her knees and started jacking my
cock. She bent over as if to look at it closely.  She leaned closer until,
sticking out her tongue, she licked the head.  My cock jumped and
stiffened.  It was a shock but a pleasant one.  She continued to lick her
way down the shaft and then back up.  Looking at me, she said, "I've heard
what a blow job is but I'm not sure how to do it."

     Knowing only what I had read in the porno books, I said, "Just put it
in your mouth, lick it and suck it."

     Slowly and hesitantly, she put my cock in her mouth and I felt her
tongue begin to rub my glans.  I almost lost it right there, but managed to
control myself.  She continued to slide my cock into her mouth, while she
continued to rub her tongue on the glans and underside of my cock.  She put
her hand around my cock and started to jack it.  It was all too much, I was
overwhelmed with the sensations she was giving me.  Especially sexy was the
sight of her bent over my cock, sucking on it.  I could feel the cum rising
in my balls, that familiar tightening sensation.  Before I could warn her,
I started to cum.  I could feel the cum spurting out and I could feel her
throat work to swallow my cum.  It seemed to go on for a long time and
Carol continued to jack my cock and lick and suck after I had finished.  I
finally had to stop her as I was too sensitive.

     Carol and I laid together snuggling afterward.  I asked her how she
liked my going down on her.  She said she had never thought anything could
feel so good.  That's when she told me that she had wanted me to do it, and
that she wondered if I would ever get around to the important parts.  We
talked about her going down on me.  Carol said she thought it was strange
but sexy.  She had been afraid of my cumming but it all happened so fast
and that I came before she knew it was happening.  She said that she and
her friends had talked about oral sex a lot.  These conversations had made
her curious and intent on trying it.

     Apparently, she and her friends discussed sex a lot.  Most of her
friends were married before us, so they had undertaken to inform Carol of
the joys of "kinky" sex.

     Carol and I both loved oral sex and it became a regular part of our
love-making.


----------------------------------------------------------------------


     My first true homosexual experience came a number of years after Carol
and I had been married.  Our marriage had fallen apart, sex was about the
only thing we had in common anymore, but that was starting to be few and
far between.  In fact, the sex didn't seem very satisfying anymore.  I had
just gotten out of the service and had started a new job where I traveled
around the country.  Maybe it was all the travel and trying to set up my
civilian career, but we had drifted apart and didn't seem interested in the
same things anymore.

     I had never really lost my interest in pornography, so I began to go
to porno book stores.  I found myself fascinated by some of the gay
magazines, so I picked up several.  I found that the pictures of naked men
together turned me on.  I thought back to the time George and I went
camping and wondered if I was gay.

     I became very concerned, as I didn't think I wanted to be gay, so I
went to the library to look up books on homosexuality.  I found a book that
described bisexuality, and it seemed to fit me to a "T".  I still admired
and desired females but I also admired and desired males.  It took a long
time for me to think through this transformation in my attitudes, but the
more I thought about it the righter it seemed for me.

     I now had to decide what to do about it.  Given that my marriage was
all but over, I had a long talk with Carol and we decided to divorce (I
didn't tell her about my bisexuality).  After we separated, I started to
look around for ways to enter the sub-culture of bisexuality.  In the
meantime I continued to indulge my fantasies with books and magazines.  I
even went so far as to get a dildo and tried to insert it when I
masturbated.

     I finally got my chance to experience a gay encounter when I was on a
business trip to New York.  I had recently purchased a book on gay meeting
places and decided to try a bar.  The bar was on Long Island about an hour
from my hotel.

     I was in my hotel room, getting ready to go to the bar.  I was trying
to decide what to wear.  I finally chose a tight pair of jeans and yellow
shirt.  I was really nervous.  The book said the bar didn't cater to any
special group, so I didn't know what to expect.  As I walked out to the
car, I almost turned back several times.  I finally got into the car and
started to drive in the direction of the bar.  While I was driving, I kept
running various scenarios through my mind.  How should I act?  What kind of
people would be there?  Would the men be wearing dresses?  I just didn't
know.

     I finally arrived at the bar.  It seemed just like any other type of
neighborhood bar in a rather run down area.  I parked in a lot next to the
bar, screwed up my courage and walked in.

     I was amazed by how "normal" the place looked.  The bar seemed just
like any other bar except that it was somewhat empty and there were only
men in it (dressed quite normally).  I guess I was early for this place, it
was only 7:30.  I walked over to the bar and ordered a beer.  I swiveled
around in my chair and scanned the place.  Sort of dingy, and old but not a
slum.  There were several male couples at the tables talking.  There were
several singles at the tables and several at the bar.  I didn't know the
procedure of cruising (other than what I had read in porno books), so I
just drank my beer slowly and occasionally looked around.

     I'd been there about a half an hour when a middle aged man caught my
eye.  He had been looking at me when I was scanning the room and our eyes
met.  He smiled at me and lifted his drink.  I smiled back and lifted my
drink.  I resumed scanning the room.  A few minutes later, the man walked
up to me beside the bar and said, "Hi, my name is Steve.  You must new
around here".  I responded, "Yes, I am.  As a matter of fact, I'm in the
area on business."  He looked at my empty glass and said, "Here, let me get
you another beer."  He order the beer and suggested that I might be more
comfortable at one of the booths along the wall.

     We carried our beers to a booth and sat down.  He said, "So, what
brings you to a gay bar on Long Island?"  I tried to explain that I was new
to the gay scene and that I didn't quite know how to act.  He wasn't very
surprised at my inexperience and was very sympathetic.  He explained that
after a while it would be as natural as cruising a hetro bar.  I told him I
hadn't had much experience with that either.  I soon found myself telling
him about my life.  My experience with George.  My marriage and divorce.
He was a very good listener, making tactful comments.

     I had been talking for about an hour when I confessed that other than
George, I had had no gay experiences at all.  He talked for about 30
minutes giving me his general history.  He had always been gay.  His first
experience had been with an older man who worked as a gardener near where
he had grown up.  He made the remark that an older man was the best person
to break a "virgin" in.

     We had been in the bar close to two hours and the bar was getting full
and loud.  Steve suggested that he and I should go to his place where it
was quieter.  With my stomach in a knot, I agreed.  I told him that I would
follow him in my car.  As we got up, I could see that his cock was hard in
his pants.  I sure knew mine was.  I felt embarrassed, I thought that
everyone in the place was staring at us and knew that we would.....well I
wasn't sure what.  All I was sure of was that I was very aroused and
attracted the this gentle and understanding man.

     It took only a few minutes to drive to his place.  When we got out of
our cars, he came over and took my hand and led me up to the front door of
a small but nice house.  After we went in, he asked if I wanted anything to
drink.  I said, "Sure, a beer would be nice."  Steve said, "Coming right
up.  Sit down and make yourself comfortable."  I sat down and looked around
the room.  It seemed right out of the fifties.  Blond wood furniture,
prints on the walls and patterned wall paper.  The only modern thing in the
room was a high tech type of reel to reel stereo.  Steve came back into the
room gave me a can of beer.  He walked over to the stereo and put on a tape
of soft romantic music.  He then turned out all but one of the lights.  I
realized that he was seducing me.  I really appreciated the effort that he
was going to, as I was unsure of what to do and very nervous.

     Steve came over and sat beside me on the couch.  Not too close and not
too far away.  He stared talking about the gay scene on Long Island and
some of his experiences.  He apparently had a lover for almost ten years,
but it had ended several years previously.  I asked questions about how one
should cruise, where to cruise and how to recognize someone who was gay.
He answered most of my questions very wisely.  The only answer that
frustrated me was the one on recognizing other gays and if someone was
interested in me.  His answer was "Experience and feeling".  We had
finished our beers and Steve went to get more.

     When he came back, he sat a little closer to me and put his arm around
me.  I felt very comfortable with Steve and leaned into his arm.  We sat
like that for a while, just chatting.  Then when I turned my head to look
at him, he leaned over and kissed me.  It felt wonderful and strange, the
soft lips and the scratchy stubble.  Steve opened his mouth and gently
forced his tongue between my lips.  He tasted like beer and mint.  I put my
hand up behind his head and held his mouth to mine.  When the kiss broke, I
reminded him that I had no experience and that he would have to show me
what to do.  He chuckled and said, "Just let it flow naturally."  We had
kissed and cuddled on the couch for a while when Steve suggested that we
would be more comfortable in the bedroom.

     Steve got up and led me into his bedroom.  The room was small but
there was a king size water bed in the center.  Steve stripped the covers
back and then started to undress.  I just stood there staring at him.
Steve noticed me staring at him and laughed.  He came over to me and
started to undress me.

     He made the act of undressing me an erotic process.  He kissed my neck
while he undid my shirt and pulled it off me.  He ran his hands lightly
over my chest and reached down to unbuckle my jeans.  He kissed my nipples
while he pushed my pants down.  He got on his knees and pulled my briefs
down and lifted my feet to get them all off.  I stood there naked with him
kneeling in front of me.

     He took my hard cock and slowly and gently started to pump it.  He
leaned over and with just the tip of his tongue, he licked the wetness off
of the tip.  I shuddered, it felt so good.  He then took my cock into his
mouth and started to suck.  I had never had such a marvelous sensation.
Carol certainly could never have matched this.  He did things with his
tongue and lips that I couldn't believe.  I snapped out of my lust-filled
haze and realized that I didn't want to cum yet.  I put my hands on his
shoulders and said, "I don't want to cum yet".  "Ok, Let's get in bed." he
replied.

     Steve stood up and quickly got undressed.  He led me over to the bed,
and set me down on the edge.  I quickly got into the bed and scooted over
to give Steve room to get in.  As Steve lowered himself onto the bed, I got
my first good look at his cock.  It wasn't anything special, which was a
relief.  I was afraid of the monster cocks I had read about and seen in the
porno books.

     As we settled down next to each other, we rolled into each others
arms.  We started to kiss passionately.  Our tongues exploring each other's
mouths.  His arms held me tightly.  We were pressed against each other,
chest to chest, cock to cock.  The feeling of his cock against mine was
such a thrill, that I almost came.  It seemed that we kissed and rubbed our
cocks together for a long time, and I was getting hotter and hotter.  Steve
broke the kiss and then whispered in my ear, "You are so sexy, I could do
this forever, but I want to suck that cock again."  I just nodded mutely.

     We disentangled ourselves and Steve reversed himself.  As he lay down
and before he started to suck, he said, "You don't have to suck me, do it
only if you want to."  Then he went down on me.  The sensations were
marvelous.  He had an educated mouth.  After a few minutes, I opened my
eyes to see his cock a few inches for my face.  I tentatively put my hand
around it and started to jack it.  It was wet on the tip.  I put out my
tongue and tasted it.  I was surprised, it didn't have much of a taste,
just a little salty.  Steve was doing such a wonderful job on my cock, I
wanted to return the feelings.  So I mustered my courage and inserted the
tip in my mouth.  It was strange, a soft hardness.  Soft and spongy outside
and rock hard underneath.  Slowly, I tried to copy what he was doing to me.
He took his mouth off of me for a moment and whispered, "Gently and watch
the teeth".  So, I said ok and tried to gently lick and suck his cock.  His
hips started to gently move back and forth forcing the cock in and out of
my mouth.  I started to enjoy this feeling, my cock being sucked and
sucking someone else's cock simultaneously.  I started to move my hips back
and forth as I felt the familiar tightness in my balls.  It was all
happening too quickly.  The tingling started and before I could stop it, I
was cumming in his mouth.  He just hummed and slowed his movements.  It was
only a moment or two later that I could feel Steve's cock start to pulse
with his orgasm.  Suddenly my mouth was filling with Steve's cum.  The
taste again wasn't bad, just different, musky with a sort of tang to it.

     Steve raised himself off of the waterbed and smiled at me.  "Not bad
for a beginner," he said.  I felt drained and warm.  Steve got up and
turned around.  He laid down beside me and we started to cuddle in each
other's arms.  "Stay the night," he said.  As the next day was Saturday, I
agreed.

     We talked for a few minutes about how nice the sex was and I soon
found myself drifting off to sleep in his arms.

     The next morning when we awoke, Steve suggested that we take a shower
together.  So we brushed our teeth and jumped into the shower.  Steve got
into the shower first, started the water and smiled at me, inviting me in.
I went into the shower and we hugged each other under the hot water.  Our
cocks began to grow hard as we kissed.  After a few moments, Steve grabbed
the soap and began to soap me up.  He did it slowly and sensuously.  After
he had soaped up my body, I had gotten very aroused but I wanted to return
the favor, so I slipped under the water and took the soap.  I started to
soap him up the same way he had done to me.  It was a strange feeling,
touching a hairy, firm body.  I took my time exploring his body, I had
never touched another male like this and it was a very erotic experience.
It was so different from caressing a woman.  I took my time soaping up his
cock, examining it closely.  I was fascinated with it, it was circumcised
like mine but it was different.  It wasn't as thick as mine and the head
was smaller.  There were thick veins running up from the base.  I didn't
neglect his balls either, they were large and heavy.  Suddenly, Steve
grabbed my shoulders and pulled me away from his cock and balls.  "I don't
want to cum yet," he smiled.  "Besides, I want to give you some lessons in
gay sex!" he added.  We quickly rinsed off and got out of the shower.

     Steve suggested we take a breather and get some coffee.  So naked, we
headed to the kitchen.  As we were waiting on the coffee to brew, Steve
started to explain the mechanics of a blow job.  I hadn't realized that
there is an art to a good BJ.  He went on the explain about how a man's
nipples are sexy but they just need to be treated rougher than a woman's.

     The coffee had finished so we both got a cup.  As we smoked and drank
our coffee, Steve explained how gays fuck.  He explained about using a good
lubricant and how it was always safer to use a rubber.  All this talking
was getting me hot, so I suggested that we do something about it.  "OK!",
he agreed with enthusiasm.

     When we had gotten back into bed, he said, "I want you to fuck me this
time, but first let's get each other worked up!"  I was thrilled at his
statement, but said, "I'll be glad to do it, and you've explained how, but
now you'll have to show me."  He reached his arms out and drew me to him
saying, "That's half the fun."  Then he gently kissed me and I opened my
mouth to his skilled tongue.  I could feel his cock poking me in the
stomach as we fell back on the bed.  His mouth was so wonderful, that I
didn't want him to stop, but he broke the kiss and started to pinch and
pull at my nipples.  There was a little pain, but more pleasure.  So, I put
my lips on his nipples and started to lick and bite.  "Harder!", he moaned.
I increased the pressure and started to pinch and pull at his other nipple
with my hand.  "Oh, yes!", he said.  After a few moments of this, Steve
said, "I want you to get me ready to fuck.  I want you to suck me but first
get some of that KY jelly and a rubber from the dresser."

     I got up and went to the dresser where he had pointed.  I got the tube
of KY and a rubber that was right beside it.  I looked at Steve
questioningly as I returned to the bed.  "Put some on your fingers and rub
it on and around my asshole and then suck me."

     Steve spread his legs and I did as I was told.  I looked closely as I
spread the KY around.  His brown hole was soft with a hairy fringe around
it.

     "That feels wonderful.  Make sure you have plenty on your fingers and
slowly and gently put a finger in." he said.  As gently and slowly as I
could, I inserted my finger in his rectum.  I could feel the strong muscle
and the soft lining past the muscle.  "That feels very good," Steve moaned,
"Now suck my cock!"

     Remembering Steve's hints on technique, I started to suck his cock.
The taste and feel of his cock was just as wonderful as last night.  With
my other hand I gripped his cock and I held him gently in my mouth with my
lips curled over my teeth.  I used my tongue, rubbing it on the underside
of his cock.  I took my mouth off his cock and licked my way down to his
balls.  I took one of the balls in my mouth and gently rolled it around.
Steve started to moan and I switched to the other ball and started jacking
him with my hand.  I returned to my main interest and just put the end of
his cock in my mouth and continued to jack him off.  I ran my tongue around
the end of his glans and tasted his pre-cum.  Remembering my other hand I
started to move my finger slowly in and out of his ass.  After a few
minutes, he moaned, "Wow, you learn quickly.  Now, put another finger in,
gently".  I pulled out my finger and slowly worked in two fingers.  I was
getting very aroused and no one had touched my cock yet!

     Suddenly, Steve said, "Stop, or I'll cum.  I want your cock in my
ass!"  I slowly withdrew my hand and let his cock slip from my lips.  I
picked up the rubber from where it had dropped on the bed.  As I was
rolling it on, Steve said, "Put plenty of KY on the rubber and spread it
out all over.  Put more in my ass and then we'll be ready".

     I followed his directions and then Steve rolled over on his stomach.
"Gently and slowly put it in, I'll tell you if you are going too fast."
Steve said in a voice muffled by the bed.  I got between his legs and
slowly put my cock against his asshole.  "A little higher." he said.  I
adjusted my position and started to slowly push in.  I could feel the
resistance as I continued to push.  Then suddenly I was past the muscle and
I slid smoothly in.  The hot tight sensation was great, I felt as if my
cock was being burned through the rubber.  It was tighter and hotter than
any woman ever was.  Steve hissed and then said, "Just stay still for a few
moments while I adjust to you.  You've got an enormous, thick cock!"

     After a few moments, Steve said, "Ok, go slowly".  I slowly started to
move my cock in and out of his ass.  I could feel the tingling sensation
starting already.  I murmured to Steve, "I'm too close, I can't take it".
Steve said, "Just lay still for a few minutes, I need to catch up to you".
I could feel Steve working his hand under him and he started to masturbate.
I could feel the urgency of my orgasm lessening.  I reach under Steve and
found his nipples and started to pinch and pull as he had taught me.

     Soon Steve said, "All right, go ahead, fuck me."  So, I started to
slowly work my cock in and out of his ass.  Steve started to mumble and I
couldn't quite make out what he was saying other than an occasional "good".
I kept to a slow pace even though I wanted to just let loose for all I was
worth.  "Faster, harder!" Steve cried.  My control slipped away at his
command.  I started to saw in and out as hard and fast as I could.  The
familiar tingling started again but time seemed to slow, the orgasm seemed
to take forever.  I could feel the separate pulses of cum all the way from
my balls to the tip of my cock.  Finally, it was over and I collapsed on
Steve's back.

     When our breathing returned to normal, Steve turned his head around
and smiled, "You sure don't need any instruction on how to fuck an ass!"  I
thanked Steve for the compliment and slowly pulled out.  I collapsed on the
bed next to Steve and we cuddled for a while.

     Sometime later, Steve suggested that we get up and shower again.
After we had washed each other again, I was hard but Steve said I would
have to wait a while, for him to recharge his batteries.

     We spent most of the weekend talking and making love like two
newlyweds.  Finally, late Sunday afternoon I told Steve I had to be getting
back.  I gave him my phone number at the motel and he gave me his.  Steve
worked odd shifts, so the soonest we could arrange to get back together was
the next weekend.  Steve's parting words were enough to keep me thinking of
the rendezvous all week.  He said, "Your next lesson will be how to get
fucked!".

     Finally, Friday arrived.  I called Steve several times that week,
talking about little things and sex.  I showed up at Steve's house Friday
after work.  I suggested that we go out to dinner as a way of repaying him
for all the food I had eaten last weekend.  Steve said, "Look, there is no
way I could repay you for the happiness you gave me last weekend, so let's
not start out figuring who owes who.  Besides I have spent hours fixing us
a nice dinner."  Sheepishly I agreed, "You're right, we're friends and
lovers not business partners."

     Steve led me into the kitchen and I helped him to finish the
preparations for dinner.  We ate right there in the kitchen.  The meal that
he had fixed was delicious.  As we consumed the swiss steak, scalloped
potatoes and salad, we talked of the news and his job (he managed a movie
theater).

     Finally, as we were lighting cigarettes, our talk turned to the main
thing on my mind.  I said, "Look, I'm kind of nervous about tonight.  I
bought a dildo a couple of months ago and I've tried to use it but well,
I'm just not sure about all this."

     Steve looked at me with understanding.  "Jon, it's not easy the first
time but it's worth it.  I'm glad to hear that you've tried it with a
dildo, that'll make things easier.  We'll just take it slow and easy.  If
it gets to be too much than I'll stop.  Ok?"  "Ok", I replied.

     Steve got up from the table and took my hand.  He pulled me up and
pulled me to him.  As he hugged me, I felt a little better.  Steve released
me and lead me into the bedroom.  Still nervous, I started to get
undressed.  By the time I had gotten naked, Steve was naked and getting the
tube of K-Y jelly and a couple of rubbers from a dresser drawer.  He put
them on the bedside table and turned to me.  "Come here" he whispered.  "I
can see that you're nervous and a little afraid, let's just start slow and
easy".  He drew me into his arms and began to kiss me, slowly his tongue
explored my mouth.  I could feel his cock rising and getting hard.
Suprisingly, my cock started to stir, I was so nervous, I wasn't sure that
it would.

     Steve slowly guided me to the bed, continuing the kiss.  As we both
sat down on the bed, he started to lightly kiss my neck and shoulders.  He
was running his hands over my chest and back.  It felt so good and the
nervousness was slowly draining out of me.  He maneuvered me into the bed
and climbed in beside me.  I was on my back and he was on his knees.  He
began to lick my cock.  My cock was hard and his tongue caresses made it
all the harder.  He took my cock into his mouth and began to slowly move up
and down.  He wrapped one hand around my cock and the other started to
gently fondle my balls.  Everything was in slow motion, the wet warm mouth
engulfing my cockhead and his hand forming a tube to caress my shaft.  I
was beginning to float on the wonderful sensations he was giving me.

     After a few more minutes of a wonderful blow job, he raise up and
reached for the K-Y jelly.  "I'm going to start to loosen you up now", he
murmured.  I felt the shock of the cold jelly as he massaged it into and
around my anus.  Steve returned to the blow job as I felt his finger begin
to press against my hole.  I must have tensed up because Steve left my cock
and said in a soft voice, "Relax.... Relax.... Relax, try to open up."  I
tried to relax the muscles there.  Steve said, "Good, just relax, bear down
a little, like you are going to take a shit".  I did as he suggested and
his finger moved in easily.  This wasn't much different than when I tried
to use the dildo on myself, so I just relaxed and enjoyed the sensations.
Steve returned to my cock and began to move his finger in and out.  After a
while Steve started pushing in a second finger and it went in easily too.
"This will feel like nothing else you have ever felt" Steve said as he
started pressing up with his fingertips.  A wonderful feeling started as he
started massaging my prostrate.  I wondered if this was how a woman felt
with a man inside her.  Steve was continuing to slowly jack my cock.

     Finally, Steve said, "I think you're ready, trust me I'll go slow and
stop whenever you want".  He reached over and picked up a rubber and slowly
rolled it over his cock.  He then applied K-Y jelly to the whole cock and
put another cold glob in and over my anus.  He turned me over and spread my
legs.  I could feel his cock rubbing between my cheeks and then pressing
against my anus.  Trying to relax as he pressed, I suddenly felt a sharp
pain and the head of his cock slipped past my sphincter.  I sharply drew in
my breath and Steve stopped.  "We'll just wait here a while until you can
adjust", he whispered.  He started to gently rub my back and arms.  After a
few moments, the pain subsided, "It feels better now", I said.  Actually,
it was more than just better, it was beginning to feel quite good.

     Steve resumed the pressure and slowly slid in the rest of the way.  He
lowered himself on to me and began kissing the back of my neck and licking
my ears.  I could feel his balls up against my skin.  I felt full and warm
with Steve covering me.  His tongue was waking new fires as it licked my
ears and neck.  Steve started moving his cock back and forth slowly.  I
could feel his balls bounce against my skin every time he pushed in.  He
was slowly picking up the rhythm and it felt great.  My cock was being
slowly rubbed against the sheet under me and his cock moved in and out.
This was beyond any expectation that I had.  I felt lustful and at the same
time, covered and protected.  My hips started to take a life of their own.
They started to move in sync with Steve's strokes.  Steve moaned, "God, you
feel great, you have such a hot ass, I won't be able to hold off very
long".  Steve kept up the slow, even rhythm and I could feel the familiar
warmth start building in my balls as my cock rubbed against the sheets.  I
started to push back against his cock harder and I started to moan and
encourage Steve, "That feels great, don't stop, do it faster, harder...".
Steve picked up speed and force and was soon fucking hard and fast, his
balls slapping against my skin.  I couldn't stop it, I could feel the
warmth begin in my balls and spread to my spine.  But it was different, the
warm and tingly feeling spread out over my whole body, giving me goose
bumps.  I could feel the cum flowing out of my cock and I shivered with the
wonderful warm sensation.

     Steve continued sawing in and out of my ass as the feeling began to
subside.  It still felt good but my orgasm was past.  It wasn't but a
minute or so until Steve started grunting and lunged hard into my ass.
"I'm cumming", he groaned.  I could feel the pulsations of his cock as his
orgasm took him.

     We lay there for a while as our breathing quieted.  I had never felt
so drained and yet I felt good, warm and intimate.  Steve began to pull out
slowly.  My ass gave a little spasm as his cock pulled out.  I rolled over
and looked into Steve's eyes.  "I love you", I whispered.  Steve smiled and
said, "And I love you, too.  Did you cum?"  I nodded and he smiled.
"You're a natural, you know that?" he asked.  "I have a good teacher", I
replied, smiling.

     Steve and I spent the next four months together as often as we could.
In addition to teaching me how to make love to a man, to suck, to fuck and
to be fucked, Steve taught me that two men can love each other emotionally
and physically, just as a man and a woman can.

     Eventually the work I had on Long Island was finished and Steve and I
tearfully parted.  I still write to him to this day and call him
frequently.  He has a new lover these past five years and seems very happy.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

     Well, that has been my sexual history, at least the highlights.  I had
several lovers since Steve and Carol, one woman and two men.  I'm not
currently involved with anyone right now.  I hope to try a threesome in the
future.  That's my current fantasy.  I know with AIDS that it will probably
remain just that, a fantasy.  I'll let you all know if it happens.

               Jon Van

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